"Why do you want to fly the skies when you don't have wings? I'll just run." Kiba (Wolf's Rain)
It seems I've been doing a lot of running around between my social life, college life, and my me time. Leaving me to daydream a lot in between. I've always been a daydreamer and oddly enough since I watched The Graduate in my cinema class; Simon & Garfunkel's The Sounds of Silence has been the theme song of my mind for the last couple of weeks making my daydreams seem almost book or movie worthy.
Though especially after watching Run Lola Run in my cinema class which had the theme of running in it, I want to rush ahead in the future but sometimes it's nice to slow down once in awhile. At least that should keep some form of balance? Maybe? Or perhaps there is silence at Guilford which is making things seem slower, well, maybe that's to be expected, it is the summer after all and the second five weeks, and half the summer students left including my roommate. But it's a peaceful kind of quiet.
Again with daydreaming, I love my East Asian Studies classes I really do, I take pride in knowing that I actually understand topics, timelines, and events between my East Asian Studies classes and it's an amazing feeling to be able to contrast and compare events and themes between the countries you learn about, so when my Sensei started talking about Japan's history and some things about China, I was like, I KNOW, I know exactly what you're talking about! I already know this. However I started asking questions about events between a certain time period after we watched Sandakan Brothel #8, (good movie, going to read the book soon) and the rest of my class blanked.
My teacher asked if anyone knew the history out of the ten students in my class, a CCE student and I raised our hands, and even the CCE student said, "Probably not as much as Megan does." Of course my teacher tried to recover the class, and say "For those who know the history already please bear with me”, and I of course couldn't help but feel out of place and like a know-it-all. How could I think that everyone would know about Manchukuo the puppet state governed by Japan after they invaded China and worked along side the last Chinese Emperor Pu Yi, or think they'd fully understand the Rape of Nanjing and the Second Sino-Japanese War that ended in defeat for Japan after World War II. Leaving Japan and China to have issues with each other especially when it comes to Japanese women's roles and occupations.
So now I kind of feel like a student and TA compared to just a student taking the class for the first time since students have already asked me what certain things are, and evey time my fellow classmates in Women in Modern Japan answer a question that's an opinion question and not know the right answer, I cringe on the inside. Especially when the class thought a Geisha was a prostitute, I about died on the inside. Best way to describe a Geisha is she is not a concubine, but an artist/entertainer, female escort, only there to be someone’s company not their date. Wow, I guess I could say I'm passionate about East Asia heh? I'm really not trying to be a kiss-up or a know-it-all; it just feels odd to be the only one who is passionate about a subject in class. Four more weeks. I think I can survive and hopefully not let my mind wander to other places when Sensei discusses things I already know to the class.
Even in my Masterpieces of the Cinema class we'll watch movies, and in my mind, I'm taking in the movie and thinking how similar I am to some of these characters from these films and how I can use those characters in my own stories. Perhaps Kaito Kuroba (Detective Conan) said it best "A thief is a creative artist who takes his prey in style...." Perhaps I'm a thief stealing amazing ideas and flipping them to fit my own creative thoughts and ambitions. Though I'm glad I'm still on the right track with an A in that class. Huzzah!
I think, no, I know, I do the most daydreaming at work, because as much as I'm on task, I still feel like the odd one out because I've joined a team of student leaders that already has a frame-work and I'm the triangle trying to fit into the circle and when you have a bunch of different personalities you learn to adapt to try to fit in with other people. I love working at fast paces, but I feel like I'm going through work in slow motion, where I just want to breeze through it. Again, I just want to run instead of walk. Though maybe it's because I have the morning shift everyday and my group has the afternoon shifts, and I don't truly get to see them. But again, I never really fit with a group, I’m more independent when doing a task. But Guilford has helped me to work better with groups. Though like most jobs there are just some people you work with and then not even think about when you leave the office. Maybe I'm not as much of a people person as I am a people pleaser, thus I volunteer a lot too.
Haha, Is it bad that I'm daydreaming even now while I'm writing all of this? Ah, summer! Gotta luv it, because all I want to be doing is laying out at the pool and soaking up some sun or be running around in Guilford's water sprinklers because it's hot outside! That'd be pretty fun, don't you think?
On that note my lovely readers, I'll be back in a couple of days, so take care of yourselves, be safe, be well, and be you! Have an amazing week!
_Meg
